“I remember my music teacher saying something along the lines of, ‘If you’re writing that now, you’ll go on to write great things in the future’,” she says. Her first ever song, ‘Me And You’, got its premiere at her secondary school assembly. Learning classical piano from the age of 11, she began writing her own songs as soon as she got the hang of the basic chord structures. “I saw this interview with Thundercat where he said his influence was Stanley Clark, and I was like, ‘Oh my God!’ I’d never heard anyone else talk about him.” “He did this film called Passenger 57 and he’s so good,” she gushes. She laughs about early obsessions with Avril Lavigne and Good Charlotte, while growing up in the West Midlands, but goes on to cite influences like Michael Jackson, Sade, and composer Stanley Clarke. The recently released ‘Good Mourning’ is her mission statement – a mixtape serving as an introduction to her sound, which flits between downtempo club tracks à la Night Slugs and glossy Noughties R&B.Ī few days after her Next Wave shoot (her first ever editorial snaps), we catch her on the phone, stealing her away from a copy of New Scientist. Her caramel-smooth voice cropped up first in 2015 on a track with balls-to-the-wall producer Scratcha DVA, but she really got people’s attention via ‘Fones’, a collab with crystalline beatmaker Mssingno. The intimacy of Clara’s sound mimics her minimal online presence, which is essentially limited to a handful of SoundCloud tracks.
I NEVER HAD THOUGHTS THAT CONTROL ME FULL
Read Full Bio Bedroom producer Clara La San is an artist keeping things private in an era when we’re told to Instagram Story our every move. Suggest a correction in the comments below.īedroom producer Clara La San is an artist keeping things private in an era when we’re told to Instagram Story our every move. I am trying to move on from the past, but memories keep resurfacing and causing me painĬontributed by Mila E. I'm trying to forget, but things just remind me I long for the person I used to be before everything became so difficult Until a negative event happened that left me feeling incredibly alone I never used to be consumed by negative thoughts and emotions To bring back joy and happiness into my life There is no one to guide me out of this darkness and towards the light I am constantly sinking deeper into this state of despair and sadness
Our relationship was going well and we were in sync with each other I want to go back to a time when things were simpler and happier
Wanna take it back to when we had it just like that You never knew how much I was struggling and hurting You were never aware of my true thoughts and feelings There are countless things that I want to say I never truly felt like we had a strong connection or bond I am consumed by darkness and feel lost and alone I feel empty and sad when you are not with meĪnd this darkness appears, leaving me stranded
I NEVER HAD THOUGHTS THAT CONTROL ME FREE
Overall, the song conveys a bittersweet feeling of nostalgia and the struggle of breaking free from the darkness of loneliness. The lyrics "I want it back / I want the old me / I'm trying to forget / But things just remind me", reflect the pain of losing someone and the difficulty of moving on from the past. The second verse highlights the struggle of overcoming the feeling of loneliness and the desire to go back to the old version of themselves before the heartbreak. The chorus of the song repeats the same lines, "And I keep falling in this darkness / And there's no one to light it up / To bright it up, yeah", reinforcing the sense of despair and hopelessness experienced by the narrator. This realization is reflected in the lyrics "My hope washes down / You never lived here / And I never felt I ever had you".
The narrator's hope is crushed, as they realize that the other person never really lived with them, leading to feelings of abandonment and emptiness. The opening lines "I get lonely when you're not here / and this darkness appears, leaving me stranded" paint a picture of a lost and lonely soul who suffocates in the absence of a significant other. The lyrics of Clara La San's song In This Darkness express the feeling of loneliness and being left behind by someone who was never truly committed to the relationship. But you never really knew I felt this way
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